E! True Hollywood Story: Street Fighter Ch. 5
By trutenor

We are in Tokyo, Japan, ready to interview the master of Saikyo-Ryu himself, Dan Hibiki. Before the interview, Dan also asked for something to eat. So one of my assistants gets Dan a sandwich. After he ate it, it was time for the interview:

Announcer: So Dan, all of your fans wanna know, how did you create the Saikyo-Ryu style?

Dan: It started after Sagat killed my father. I managed to find Gouken, and he started to train me in the art of Shotokan Karate.

Announcer: But then you were kicked out...

Dan: Who told you that? Ken! I'll kill you Ken!! Oyagii!!!

(Ken is offstage, laughing at the spectacle Dan is making of himself)

Announcer: Anyway, you and Gouken parted ways. So then what did you do?

Dan: I used what little bit of Shotokan I knew and tried to mix it up with some moves of my own. One of my special touches is my Gadouken! I throw it with one hand! Isn't that the coolest!

Announcer: Indeed. Although it only goes about 3 inches before fizzing out...

Dan: That's not my fault! It's Capcom's! They make me look bad so Mr. "The Fight is All" looks better in comparison!

Announcer: So how do you feel about the treatment that you've been receiving?

Dan: Well I was told to keep quiet or else I would make Capcom look bad. But I don't care! They make me look bad! And aren't I a reflection of Capcom if I am one of their characters?

Announcer: You have a very valid point. It seems that you're not as dumb as everybody makes you out to be...

Dan: I'm dumb? Who says that I'm dumb!!

Announcer: Forget I said that. How do you feel towards Sagat?

Dan: That freaking pirate killed my Dad! Of course, that was after my dad gave Sagat the "eyepatch" look!

Announcer: You mean, your dad is the one responsible for taking out Sagat's eye?

Dan: Indeed! He was a great man! And I shall not rest until his death is avenged!

Announcer: Let's change the subject slightly. How do you feel towards Ken?

Dan: Ken is a bishounen. That's all he is. But he is a good person. And his wife is hot!

(Ken looks at Dan like he is going to kill him)

Dan: But she deserves him very much!

Announcer: How do you feel about Ryu?

Dan: Ryu is one of the best fighters out there. But he has no social life whatsoever. He's like a hermit. "The Fight is All". That gets tired after awhile. And Chun-Li wants him, but Ryu is too shy to say anything. I sometimes wonder what Chun sees in him.

Announcer: By any chance, you wouldn't happen to have a crush on Chun-Li, would you?

Dan: No comment.

Announcer: Next question. Do you know where Ryu might be?

Dan: There have been rumors that he runs his own dojo now. I've heard that it is located about 5 blocks from here. But I don't know if it's true or not. Like I said, I've only heard rumors...

Announcer: You mean Ryu runs the Shotokan dojo about 5 blocks from here?

Dan: I don't know. But there is one way to find out...

Announcer: Well, thanks for your time, Dan. If you don't mind, would you like to come along with us?

Dan: Okay. I've got nothing else to do.

So there you have it folks! Dan Hibiki has just given us at E! a lead as to where Ryu might be! And Ken and Dan are with us as well! Don't miss the next episode folks! We might have some answers!